“That’s so autistic dude”.
If you are around what one might call “gamers” long enough, you’re probably pretty familiar with this phrase. Get stunned in League for 5 second straight? “That champion is so autistic”. Teammate won’t move to the objective with you when you ping it 5 times in a row? “That guy is literally autistic”. It seems that over the years, autism awareness seems to be getting more popular in the gaming scene, just not represented in a particular way.
I’ve had a bit of a strange relationship with this phrase. I’ve of course never really felt comfortable with saying it but hearing it so often around me made me internalize its sting a bit. I started feeling “oh, it doesn’t bother me too much because I know they don’t really have autistic people in mind when they’re frustrated in the heat of the moment. Who’s getting hurt when people say that?”. However, I found myself sort of growing more and more uncomfortable with that phrasing as I heard it more and more over the years as I’ve started to understand my own relationship with my own disability. I started to think, “why autism? What is it about autistic people that make them such a punching bag to which compare things we find stupid?”
As these thoughts were lingering on my mind the more I see that kind of language while playing video games from random people on the internet, I also see more places where autism pops up again in a not-so-great light; vaccines. Everyone is familiar with the old motto: “Vaccines cause autism!” we see declared again and again. How do you think that makes us feel? The fact that these people would choose to give up life-saving medical treatment than have an autistic child? Why is autism such a curse?
And as I’ve been thinking about it more, I’m pretty sure this is the crux of what’s bothering me about all of these social trends we’ve been seeing in regards to how autism is viewed: the image of autism is so twisted that people with it aren’t even seen as people, and just as stupid animals. Many people have the image in their minds of the most severe kinds of autism when they make these statements. In the general population’s eyes, having autism is all about being too “weird and dumb” to even speak “normally”, or about the very sensitive ones who start screaming with hands cupped over their whenever there’s a really loud banging. This view of autism is not inaccurate, per se, in that there are many people who exhibit these behaviors, but where the danger of this comes is when people start having these thoughts that move this image from a simple difference in interacting to being laughed at for their differences, or even inferior when we freeze up or break down in certain social situations.
I’m rather lucky that my friends understand when I’m overwhelmed and are respectful enough to give me space, but I’ve heard stories of other autistic people my age where the people they’re hanging out with at a party or other social gathering laughing at them and then even mocking them later when they have to crouch and cover their ears whenever they get frustrated. Call me crazy, but I seriously think that the two example I gave at the beginning, the “that’s so autistic” and “vaccines cause autism” views make us almost seem like strange animals to be laughed at, and therefore have a strong reinforcing effect on why people don’t take our differences as seriously.
I’d hate to sound so cliché, but I really do believe that this is 100% another great example of fear of difference. Because we act and even react so differently, as one of my favorite writers on Aspergers put it, it’s sort of like we’re aliens not accustomed to lots of the social rules and norms. However, I really do believe that focus on mental health and disabilities is getting a lot better nowadays. Just like with calling things “gay”, I’ve noticed people calling things “autistic” or “retarded” a lot less as people are taking mental disorders and neurodiversity more seriously. At least for myself, I hope that one day in the future the current warped image will be so far removed that I’ll be just as comfortable asking new classmates to respect the fact that I’m autistic as asking people to respect preferred pronouns without making people worried that I’m going to start screaming randomly.